Our life has been divided into the following four stages:
Kaumaram is the period between balyam and youvanam – 7yrs to 18 years, where we start our studies and become scholars. During this period parents will be after us on the studies to see that we get good education as well as tune us with good behaviors, courage to face the future.
Adolescence is one of the stages of development. This is a physical journey of a body. About 21% of Indian population is adolescents (about 243 million). They are the future of the nation, forming a major demographic and economic force.
WHO ARE ADOLESCENTS
Adolescents are the young people aged between 10 to 19 y. It is a transitional stage of physical, physiological and psychological development from puberty to legal adulthood. WHO defines adolescents as individuals who are going through a very special phase in their lives – adolescence. A phase during which enormous physical and psychological changes occur, as do changes in social perceptions and expectations.
TEENAGE: STAGE OF PSYCHOLOGICAL CONFUSION
And Teenage means, their intelligence is being hijacked by the hormones. So suddenly the world doesn’t look the same. what was Just people before ,now became males and females. That is, suddenly they are only interested in half the humanity. It is not a small change.
We will see the boys, they don’t even look at their mothers directly, they still can’t take off their body parts. As a parent, we must have to understand this, that it’s new to him and he is just trying to cope with it. If we are a good friend, he will definitely talk to us about his problems they are struggling with. Most parents’ have many other friends, so children make their own friends,and they ask the help with them, they come up with some Wacky advices, bcoz they are also in the same situation. But they don’t come to us if we are a boss or owner of his life, so learn to become a good friend till our child turn 18. And we have that responsibility too, since we are either a mother or a Father.
A STAGE OF VIBRANT PITTA
A stage of life where both pitta and kapha are equally active.
So we can observe that,
10-12 years kapha+++
12-16 years kapha+++
- That’s, Kapha & pitta almost in equal strength
- So Equal consideration for dhatupushti in all and artava vridhi in girls are important.
- Taila and Masha are kaphapittakara,and maintain a healthy arthava .
- For dhathu pushti and sukra vridhi,milk,aja mamsa,satavari,ghrita will help.
- tila,olive and fish –oil
- Saka varga
- amlaphala like dadima,dhatri,vrikshamla
- protein, fats and carbohydrates
- Unsaturated fatty acids
Vitamin rich food etc
So they need,
- Psychological wellbeing
- Nutritional support
- Personal hygiene
PSYCHOLOGICAL WELL-BEING: MOST UNTOUCHED AREA
Mental health problems are one of the most neglected issues among adolescent.
youths reported suicidal behaviours with females four times more prone than males. This suicidal behaviour is associated with the following,
- Difficulty in independent decision making,
- premarital sex,
- sexual abuse,
- physical abuse from parents and
- mental disorders.
The prevalence rate of child and adolescent psychiatric disorders in the community has been found.
Alcohol use disorder and psychiatric problems are the important cause of Years Lost due to Disability.
When our children are growing up, when they become teenager means they are growing rapidly or in another words it is the beginning to” becoming us”. In the infancy our children are dependent on us for everything, bcoz they are helpless.Suppose the baby popped out and stood up and ask “who the hell are you”? We won’t like this baby. But he takes 14-15yrs to ask this question. In fact that is all a teenager will be asking. So if we want to be some body, we should not define our boundaries, like when the child was infant, when he crawled ,we crawled, and when now when he wants to swing, we must be able to swing with him, but now we still want to crawl with him. Then he is not interested. Then the parents are ridiculous in the eyes of adolescents. Did our parent looked ridiculous in our eyes? Unless we’re old by the time we are 12.
GRAND PARENTS: ARE MORE DIPLOMATIC
Everyday the life is changing with in them bcoz they are growing rapidly, and people around them are not able to grasp. Usually grand parents are more endearing than parents. They have a little far away look. Adolescence means getting poisoned by the hormones, and old age means we have been slowly getting released from that. So a kind of understand. But those who are in their middle age have no clue where the hell we are. Even historically the middle-age is represented as a confused stage. So don’t deal with the teenagers, but make ourself available to be dealt by them. Make them responsible for everything .
For example , do you have the courage to hand over your one month income to manage the house. Just give them responsibility, dramatically it will change. But if he blows it up it will happen to him also, let him go through it for a month, definitely you can keep a reserve . Let him learn in a protected environment than out on the street tomorrow morning.
MAKE THEM A RESPONSIBLE PERSON
In the ancient period, at the age of 6 or 7 the children are sent to Gurukulam (Teachers House) where they have been taught of Vedas, Sashtras, Dhanur Vidya, Ayurvedam, Artha Sastram, Astrology, Palmistry, sangeetham and all kind of Sastras, as per interest of the child. By the time the children complete all courses, they will reach an age of 18 or 20 years. They go to gurukulam as child and return as young man with all knowledge.
Brahamacharya ashram, during the course of their studies, they are also taught of meditations and Brahmacharyam which is most important for keeping good health and strength.
The students possess all kinds of skills, strength and come home as young man.So if we really want to do something with our children then help them to expand. Not only the body is growing, the potential of being a human being is growing. Then allow them to expand. Instead of that we are trying to constrict them. Then we will have a huge problem. So not the restriction, but responsibility will put them on the track. And above all no body should think that this child belongs to us . when he’s coming to teen, he will tell that I don’t belong to you, in his own way. That is we cannot own another life, but another life has chosen to come through us, cherish that ,value that, and should be included in your life.
NUTRITIONAL SUPPORT: LAYING A STRONG FOUNDATION FOR A HEALTHY PROGENY
Nutrient food is a must to keep good health and different kinds of vitamins are necessary for the growth of our each organ and to keep healthy strong body.
Adolescents have increased nutritional requirements demanding diet rich in protein, vitamins, calcium, iodine, phosphorus and iron due to rapid growth spurt and increased physical activity.
They are also highly prone for eating disorders like anorexia nervosa or binge eating due to body dissatisfaction and depression. Inadequate diet intake at this age leads to stunted growth and delayed sexual maturation . Lot of junk food products are promoted by celebrities with catchy advertisements leading to adaptation of unhealthy food habits.
Use of mass media is higher among adolescents . It plays an important role in habit picking and decides their lifestyle pattern. Television viewing in childhood and adolescence is associated with overweight, poor fitness, smoking and raised cholesterol in adulthood . Media influences the diet and lifestyle among adolescents and leads to nutritional disorders by making them sedentary and giving false hopes. Habits like dieting and exercising inspired by a media celebrity cannot be taken as a positive impact, often they do it in an incorrect way and consume low quality protein supplements without proper guidance which may lead to complications like renal failure. Instead of taking balanced diet they starve and end up in anorexia nervosa.
PERSONAL HYGIENE: BASIS OF ACHIEVING HEALTH
The importance of following menstrual hygiene has been explained very elaborately in classic ayurvedic texts itself is showing its importance in bringing up healthy future generatiion.It is very important that the woman takes care of herself during the menstrual bleeding i.e. the 3 days of menstruation since there will be a lot of changes taking place in her body and mind.
Restrictions to be followed during menstrual bleeding
Below mentioned are some of the rules and regulations related to diet and life style which needs to be followed by the woman during menstruation period which are relevant to this period–
- Brahmacharini – should observe chastity
- She should eat meal made up of ghee, shali rice and milk or meal made up of barley and milk.
- In order to get her body slightly emaciated and to get her digestive system purified, she should take less quantity of the above mentioned food (havishya, yavaka etc)
- She should avoid pungent, hot and salty food substances
- She should not undergo treatments like nasya i.e. inhalations, sudation and cleansing treatments like vomiting etc( panchkarma procedures).
- Kalyana dhyayini – She should think good for three days and maintain pleasantness .
From the day of onset of menstruation itself, the woman should avoid the below mentioned activities –
- Divaswapna – sleeping during daytime
- Anjana – application of collyrium
- Abhyanga – taking massage
- Lepana – anointment of pastes
- Nakha chedana – paring of nails
- Pradhavana – running
- Excessive laughing
- Excessive talking
- Listening to many sorts of sounds
- Avalekhana – combing
- Exposure to too much breeze
- Indulging in too much physical exercises
- Physical union
On the fourth day –
- She should apply cream made of saffron, aloevera, sandalwood, almond.
- After applying cream, she should take bath along with head wash
- After bath, she should wear white or new garments along with garland of flowers and ornaments etc
- After adorning herself with clean dress and ornaments she should enchant pious and religious hymns
- Following this she should first of all see her husband clad in white garments
After getting cleansed and taking bath –
Charaka tells that the couple wearing white clean dress and having worn garlands of flowers, having purity of mind and feel of love and admiration to each other will be fit to have physical union.
Sushruta following the same opinion as that of Charaka tells that after getting cleansed by taking bath and after wearing clean clothes, garland and ornaments the woman should see or meet her husband.
Dalhana, commentator of Sushruta further tells that a woman, who has lost old blood and has regained new blood is said to be cleansed i.e. shuddha.
Kashyapa advises that. After bath, and after getting neatly dressed, she should enter the place of God with pious feelings and. She should then worship the oblation fire with rice and ghee. After looking at Brahmanas, Gods, Vishnu and Skanda etc, she should perform obeisance to them. She should also worship the Sun and Moon. She should not salute evil spirits like preta, pishacha or rakshasas. Following this she should see her husband.
Why these restrictions?
These restrictions probably to rest the woman physically and mentally during the menstruation. And also to keep her vaata in normalcy ( anuloma gati) not bringing in the reverse direction or viloma gati.
Since physical union is advised after menstruation, the restrictions may reflect towards keeping the woman anticipating to conceive during fertile period, physically and mentally healthy and fit.
Consequences due to non-avoidance of restricted acts
It is advised that the woman should have physical union with her husband following menstruation, i.e. after getting purified and having followed all the mentioned restrictions and rituals following menstruation. These restrictions make sense in terms of preparedness for conceiving. These restrictions should be followed otherwise too.
If the woman does not avoid the described acts due to ignorance, negligence, greed or fortune, the doshas get vitiated. These vitiated doshas reach the fetus post-conception and produce Some abnormalities.
Abstinence during periods:
In the above explanation, the woman is advised to live separately from her husband and other family members during periods. She is advised to take rest and maintain hygiene. After three days, she is advised to take bath, wear garland, perfumes and get back to her normal life with her fellow family members.
If these restrictions are not followed, then her menstrual health and hormonal balance and personal hygiene will be hampered. This may later cause ill health in her and also to the fetus, whenever she conceives.
Challenges in Parenting
Parents have greater responsibility in guiding their children but due to cultural barriers they neglect to talk about physical and physiological changes, in consequence of this, growing children learn about sexuality and secondary sex characteristics from their peer groups or other inappropriate sources leads to abnormal social behaviour. Most of the children’s psychiatric disorders were unidentified because of parent’s ignorance and negligence.
REALISE : IT IS THE BEGINNING OF REVOLUTION, NOT A PROBLEM
Every age is a problem, such as stone age is a problem, like wise bronze age, middle age, modern age, and now the computer age is an immense problem . The moment we identify every phase of life as a problem, consciously we start seeking death, for our self and those who surround us. We do not know this, but we create this thing, an eco system in our mind, and the solution is to free from all these. We came here on this earth to experience life, we call it different facets of life, but all are calling it as different problems of life. If we die we will have funeral problems. When we start identifying it as a problem, the unpleasantness happens. Nothing Will Change Until We All See Ourselves As Part Of The Problem And Part Of The Solution.
For Many Of These Issues We Can Make A Difference, Every Day !